Wednesday, 19 November 2014

Half Girlfriend: Bollywood material

***Spoiler Alert***

The story starts with Chetan and another person(the hero, probably played by Arjun Kapoor/Ranveer Singh in the future) and goes to a flashback as in most of his books. The hero, Mr. Madhav Jha, is a Bihari who is a state level basketball player, not to mention a Prince in his little village. He gets admitted to a famous high-class English medium college in Delhi where he meets the heroine, Ms. Riya Somani (probably Deepika Padukone/ Anushka Sharma) who is tall, fair and also a basketball player with great eyebrows! The hero's antennae pick up the heroine's great legs in her shorts and the love story begins. What is it with Chetan Bhagat and girls wearing shorts? I just don't get it.. Anyway, this heroine is not falling for college love and she agrees to be his "Half-girlfriend". Madhav has no other go but to accept it. They go out together, play basketball, she hosts her birthday party and they do other boring stuffs. He doesn't give up trying to get words out of her mouth. This goes on for a while, long enough to bore the readers, and then one day, oops! Madhav makes a mistake and Riya doesn't talk to him anymore. Same campus, not talking, showing faces, ignoring when the other person walks by, not wishing for birthdays... So childish. Kids in 3rd grade behave more matured than this!

On college day, Riya and Madhav make small talk again and Madhav tries to apologize. Riya is so generous out of the blue and says everything is fine and that she has to give him something. Now any dumbo would have taken the clue that she was going to give her wedding invitation to him. But our hero is not that sharp you see. He gets shocked, disappointed, heartbroken, lonely and miserable while Riya is off to London.

Next comes part II- In his village (yeah that was just the first part of the story). Here is where he actually emerges as a hero. He is crowned the Prince of Dumraon. He helps his mom run a school for the under privileged children. But they need funds to improve the infrastructure of the school. I know this part should move me but Chetan's way of mixing politics with his usual love story is not so successful. Not that I do not appreciate people digging into the darkness of India and trying to uplift the country by creating awareness but I feel Chetan Bhagat is overrated when it comes to motivating the youth. Because clearly he is doing it the wrong way. Dominating love story with a glimpse of a poor Bihar? We all know what the youth would concentrate on. And even if they do want to be motivated, the passion to take an initiative stays only for so long as the commercial mix up masala. This part was more of a complaint journal than an inspiring novel. I did not even enjoy his subtle sarcasm as there was hardly any. Chetan is losing it.

Madhav is informed by his local MLA that Bill Gates is visiting the village. Madhav decides to ask for funding for his school from Gates foundation. But he is supposed to make a convincing speech in English, his biggest fear and enemy. This is when Riya makes her entry again! They meet "accidentally", become friends again and she helps him with his English classes. And oh with a kiss too! She goes to his house to visit the school and to have his mother's famous litti-choka. The mother character is typical of Chetan. She is charming and caring until the guy brings the girl home. The minute the girl sets foot in her house, the mother character starts PMSing. After the speech for Mr. Bill Gates, Riya vanishes with a note saying she is suffering from cancer (apparently there is no other fatal incurable disease for heroes and heroines). Madhav is heartbroken again. He gets her journal from her landlord and gives it to Chetan Bhagat (I have no idea why). Chetan reveals the fact that she is still alive and it is the noble strategy of Madhav's mother to send Riya away for good.

Part III- With just a hunch that Riya might be in New York, he goes all the way across the globe to find her. Only after reaching there he realizes that people don't call it The Big apple for no reason. Dumb but apparently a very romantic move. After searching for two months and two weeks he gives up because he has only two more weeks in New York and he decides to go sight seeing. But that's not the reason. The hero has to give up, especially in the last few days, only then when the mission actually succeeds it will seem triumphant and lets admit it, its a happy moment for all of us. So yeah, he stumbles upon a local singer who gives information that "Ray" is singing in a local bar. And get this, he literally runs to the local bar from his place and finds his Riya with beautiful eyebrows again. Now that's her third entry in one bloody book! Ugh! They kiss and hug and all is well in the world again. The Prince and the Princess get back to Dumraon, Mother-Villain turns soft on getting a grandson (she has to otherwise the story won't end), the school is flourishing, Madhav and Riya visit the Big Apple for three months a year (Only limited period offer allotted for Heroine's dreams because they are not so important except for their shorts). Grandson plays basketball and Chetan inaugurates the school function. Happy ending!